Turn of the century

2011-07-13T10:24:00.001-07:00

Without realising it, I have already lost myself.

I need to find myself again.

2011-02-07T04:53:00.000-08:00

i just went to the cbox and saw that wenyi said they come here on schooldays too! so i should post something here for them in the midst of my busy schedule HAHAHA I SO NICE CAN! :D:D

actually i have nothing to say la haha. cny was very boring for me compared to my friends i think and every year we do the same things so nothing to say haha. i shall just blog about:

my social life is very, very, very screwed up.

thats all that i have been thinking today. i mean its not like i don't have friends who care about me la its just. i realise i have basically been hanging around ppl, most of whom i sort of already know in rg and the ppl i actually know in jc i don't really talk to them. even though there are some that i want to continue keep in contact with. arghh esp. the shanghai ppl. i made the mistake of not continuing to keep in contact with them cos i was afraid, we don't see each other often, etc. etc. they were a damn fun bunch of ppl and everytime i think about them i always think to myself that my class cannot possibly even hold a candle to them la. minus my closer friends. so ultimately its partly my fault. but can also say that 我跟他们无缘. i talk more to ppl whom i only spent 7 days with than with most other ppl in class, whom i have spent 1 year plus with. how ironic.

i have screwed up majorly in this area so i dont expect anything miraculous to happen. i just hope after j2 i go uni and meet more ppl and different ppl. thats partly why i want to go overseas, even alone with nobody i know so that i can start anew.

btw, i actually forgot to tell charlotte this blog exists. oops.

2011-01-13T07:01:00.001-08:00

you are supposed to give yourself time to forget someone. that is on top of minimising contact, locking up memories.

but i really don't want to give this up just like that.

2010-11-19T06:45:00.001-08:00

i dont care if anyone doesnt read this post cos nobody sort of knows this blog so if anybody happens to see this please tag even if you are doing random blog hopping or we dont really know each other bla bla bla thank you very much (:(:

but anyway i think i am going to have a relatively sad birthday tomorrow which is not really anybody's fault its just overwhelming of emotions thanks to yuxi who dropped a (sort of) bombshell on me today. ok the bombshell is not the news actually its the implication on me i feel quite happy (objectively) about the news anyway but then again THANKS ALOT YUXI :( and yes this got me thinking. and thinking. and thinking. all the way from around 2 plus to now and its all revolving around the same issue. THIS SUCKS because it was history already then it resurfaced again. i swear i really xiang tai duo. oh and my birthday is sad cos tmr i have piano in the morning then got 2 hours tuition then have to celebrate birthday at grandmother's house with ppl i never talk to. THIS IS NOT THE WAY THAT I HAD THOUGHT TO SPEND MY BIRTHDAY. sighs. plus guess what i am sick :/ blocked nose and runny nose ASFJHDSKFJHD sadness.

but in any case today was a sort of eventful day we celebrated sherm's birthday bla bla bla i shant elaborate more i am too tired >< and sorry for rambling cos i just went trixy fong's blog and read her latest rambling post then i laughed out on the spot cos really quite funny HAHAH so i got influenced.

ok whatever i am signing off.

2010-10-25T08:05:00.000-07:00

我们停留在时光的原处, 其实早已被洪流无声地卷走.

总有一天都会面目全非,时光没有教会我任何东西,却教会了我不要轻易去相信神话.

我不寂寞,我只是一个人而已 ,我的世界有我一个人就好,已经足够热闹.

你随便的说,我却认真的难过.

2010-10-21T07:36:00.000-07:00

I revived my blog! I think it will last only one post though >< well at least i changed the settings so that PPL WONT KEEP TELLING ME MY AGE IS WRONG. HAHAHA. I don't know what to say. lol. i think i am just not used to blogging on a public blog haha.
anyway this post is just for the sake of blogging. i am coming back when i think of what to write. haha.

2008-08-16T09:04:00.000-07:00

I think its kind of weird when i am doing this int he middle of the night, when I embrace sleep and all. Don't ask me why, though, I was supposed to be doing my vivo vace but ended up listening to music, checking for twilight movie news and blog-hopping a.k.a. stalking XD then I decided to do shanjee's quiz :D

THREE NAMES YOU GO BY:
- yingzi a.k.a. chesspiece! XD
- cheow
- cheowying

THREE SCREEN NAMES YOU HAVE HAD:
- twilightgal5 (:
- ying
- can't think of anymore, haha

THREE PHYSICAL THINGS YOU LIKE ABOUT YOURSELF:
- uh, strength?
- eyes
- ears!

THREE PHYSICAL THINGS YOU DON’T LIKE ABOUT YOURSELF:
- height
- shoulders ( i should be proud of this, but unfortunately I am not a guy D:)
- fingers

THREE PARTS OF YOUR HERITAGE:
- Chinese
- Hokkien
- Singaporean

THREE THINGS THAT SCARE YOU:
- I totally agree with shanjee on the part on cockroaches. I used to think otherwise, but after that cello room incident.. *shudders*
- Vivo vace. Totally.
- Having to talk for a long time about stuff I don't know. (which is, essentially, vivo vace)

THREE OF YOUR EVERYDAY ESSENTIALS:
- Computer
- Food
- Music, definitely (:

THREE THINGS YOU ARE WEARING NOW:
- Orange shirt
- Shorts
- Specs

THREE OF YOUR FAVORITE BANDS OR MUSICAL ARTISTS:
- I generally like boybands.. backstreet boys!
- hmmm i have no preference for chinese pop though, i think they are all equally good :D
- Beethoven Pathetique Sonata! my fav XD

THREE OF YOUR FAVORITE SONGS (RIGHT NOW):
- Lose it all - Backstreet boys
- She Will Be Loved - Maroon 5
- ohmygosh, I really don't know. I can list so many others ... XD

THREE THINGS YOU WANT IN A RELATIONSHIP:
- Understanding
- Love
- Comfortable-ness (:

TWO TRUTHS AND A LIE, IN NO PARTICULAR ORDER:
- I love watching ARTGYM(:
- I love strings!
- I love 304!

THREE PHYSICAL THINGS ABOUT THE PREFERRED SEX THAT APPEAL TO YOU:
- Face
- Smile
- Eyes

THREE OF YOUR FAVORITE HOBBIES:
- Reading!(:
- Watching artgym(:
- Releasing strength on my piano with Brahms' Rhapsody Op. 72 when I get really fed up about math! XD

THREE THINGS YOU WANT TO DO REALLY BADLY RIGHT NOW:
- Sleep XD but i can't my brother is still stuck to the computer D:
- Read Breaking Dawn
- Run (obviously it would be crazy to do it at midnight XD)

THREE CAREERS YOU’RE CONSIDERING/YOU’VE CONSIDERED:
- Piano teacher (when I am down)
- Urban planner
- Study about human origin (:

THREE PLACES YOU WANT TO GO ON VACATION:
- Switzerland!
- Austria!
- Japan! <33333

THREE NAMES YOU LIKE:
- Ophelia
- Alicia
- Kirsten

THREE THINGS YOU WANT TO DO BEFORE YOU DIE:
- Write a movie script or a book(:
- Compose a heartbreaking lullaby
- Tour around the world, I think

THREE WAYS THAT YOU ARE STEREOTYPICALLY A GIRL:
- I gossip. Its a bad habit i guess.
- I look like one.
- I want affection XD does that count? (:

THREE WAYS THAT YOU ARE STEREOTYPICALLY A BOY:
- I don't have any skirts, only formal ones for piano exams XD and that doesnt count!
- I can play rough if I want to.
- I have broad shoulders.

THREE PEOPLE THAT YOU WOULD LIKE TO SEE TAKE THIS QUIZ NOW:
- Yuxi
- Li Khee
- yunshu, haha!

o.m.g. i finished this super lengthy quiz and my brother isn't even done yet XD and its 12.30 in the morn AND i find myself wondering why nina isn't online XD ok. gotta take a break now and maybe catch up on my vivo vace ( which, by the way, I haven't touched since 9pm. oops.)

2008-08-15T19:01:00.000-07:00

i figured out i must do a post soon ; its been like three months since the last one and wth, i didn't even do any during the halls, so yeah. by right i should be doing shanjee's quiz, but i am so not in the mood D:

i can' tthink of anything to post, here. but later i shall edit this :D

2008-05-22T05:07:00.001-07:00

I predict that this is one of the longest posts int he history of this blog. don't mistake me; I didn't have an eventful day today XD haha
the reason is, well, i got tagged by likhee to do a quiz! hahaha I know you are going like 'duh' cos its on my tagboard!
ok shall not crap any longer. here goes nothing:

THE QUIZ-ZERROO

A) people who have been tagged must write their answers on their blogs & replace any question that they dislike with a new question formulated by themselves.

B) tag 8 people to do this quiz & those who are tagged cannot refuse. these people must state who they were tagged by & cannot tag the person whom they were tagged by. continue this game by sending it to other people.

#1 if your lover betrayed you, what will your reaction be?
definitely very angry and very sad and down goes my confidence level:(

#2 if you can have a dream to come true, what would it be?
extremely good grades be extremely optimistic about life(:

#3 what will your dream wedding be like?
haha i dunno.. never thought about that before

#4 What would you do with a billion dollars?
go on a around-the-world tour and migrate to Switzerland(:

#5 what's your dream house like?
haha i love this! a bungalow with a main house and a poolhouse, as well as a pool and porch and garage and a jacuzzi and a lawn as well as a small plot of grass for a fish pond and some land for growing veggies(:

#6 which is more blessed, loving someone or being loved by someone?
being loved by someone!

#7 How long do you intend to wait for someone you really love?
very long(:

#8 if the person you secretly like is already attached, what would you do?
depends on how i feel about the person. and also my mood. haha!

#9 is there anything that has made you unhappy these days?
loads. i am always unhappy:( some people will know that. mainly my pessimistic thoughts, grades and relationships.

10 What cheers you up the fastest?
family outings especially with my cousins!(:

#11 how do you see yourself in ten years time?
smart, socially self-adept and confident

#12 who is currently the most important people to you?
my family! and close friends(:(:

#13 what kind of person do you think the person who tagged you is?
haha likhee! a very nice and helpful person,very committed to her responsibilities ~ OH OH very responsible person!(:

#14 would you rather be single & rich or married but poor?
married and rich?haha though it isnt a choice here..

#15 what's the first thing you do every morning?
on weekdays, think "shit, there's school"
on weekends, think "oh no, have to do loads of homework!"

#16 would you give all in a relationship?
i would love to say no, but the truth is, and has been proven many many times: YES.

#17 if you fall in love with two people simultaneously, who would you pick?
depends on thier characters, really

#18 what type of friends do you like?
share my humour and interests, share weal and woes with me, and funny!

wonderfully finished(: haha gonna tag 8 people now!

2008-05-17T01:10:00.000-07:00

I think its like, super super super long time since i blogged. haha. and i decided to just reply tags on the tagboard in future so that i dont have to refer back, blah blah (=

ok MYAs were bad, but not unexpected:/ satisfied with geog and math though. haha but not the rest):(

ok hmmm currently i cant think of anything, but my parents officially banned me from all sorts of entertainment :( including this, but i am gonna secretly post, or something. oh, and i am always thinking of random stuff or the day's events to post, but never gets around to doing it, so when i really post, i can't think of anything *frustrated*

ah wells. laytah:)

<3, me

2008-04-30T01:43:00.000-07:00

according to some, my blog is dead-ed now. i shall post to revive it. so that ppl like yuxi can tag.

today my SS and chem really sucked. seriously. i didnt finish both, and still managed to come home without any pessimistic thoughts. i am realy super. chem is on the brink of failing, though. SS: well, i did not write my resolution. and believe it or not, all the descriptions of the priciples of governance were totally blank.

oops. gotta go.

2008-04-14T03:32:00.001-07:00

omg. it seems a super long time since i blogged. haha. what with that super hectic week, i am pretty zoned out now. tsk tsk.

ok, nth much, except that tomorrow is RJCONCERT! another long day. i am super un-enthu about this. maybe because i don't have the confidence unlike in other concerts. i can't help thinking we will die halfway, or something.

cheered myself up by watching the O.C season 1 on tudou<3. its super nice except that it took the whole day. and i haven't even finished it yet. 3 more seasons to go. but i feel rather depressed after watching it. i think i sympathise with the characters. sigh. i think after that i shall try gossip girl. see whether have time. but it always takes forever. double sigh. i can't even watch during hols. ~~SAFE MODE DOES NOT HAVE SOUND~~ which means i have to go through a huge process of downloading. sianz.

after that i ended up doing bio notes, of all things. there is so much i still don't understand for other subjects, like chem, physics, maths, SS, blah blah.

so well.

Tag replies:
to shanin: lets see if we still remember then (:
to tian: thanks for looking forward(: haha hope we live up to your expectations!
to annie: hihi(: i kind of miss playing it now(:
to yuxi: thanks(:
to priya: your words and wisdom, I shall never forget(:
to yunshu: haha your blog so infomative XDD blog sth informal!

2008-03-28T06:20:00.000-07:00

Tag replies:
to shanjee: haha I CANT WAIT TO PLAY MISS SAIGON~ i am getting tired of little suite and fantasia. though fantasia sounds nice(:
to tianyuan: hi pal! now you are sitting so far away from me sigh:((
to euicegoh: hi(: haha i guess the image is stuck on our minds:D
to nicole: HIIII! really missed you and your batch lotz:( i am fine(: how are you? XD
to yunshu: (adopts yuxi's laugh) muahahaha!
to jiaqian: yay! we are going for house prac onmon together!(:
to yuxi: shu2 neng2 sheng1 qiao3 mah! haha you forgot how to do already?

2008-03-21T05:33:00.000-07:00

today i baked a cake using the recipe from cooking class. however my oven died and i was left with a "chao-da" cake instead. lol. but i scraped the crust off and spread whipped cream all over. shall post pics somedayXD this is my 2nd time doing a cake at home. the first time was during the hols and it was simply ARGH.yay tomorrow i get to bake another cake (putting off studyingXD)for my brother's birthday celebration (his real birthday is on mon)and maybe i will bake 2 cakes tomorrow! one for consumption and one for celebration lol. i feel really guilty cos i haven't done anything constructive today *ahem*

i have a feeling there is something wrong with my blogging today. somehow the words don't flow right :/ hmmm.

anyways. nothing to blog really. and oh yes, the trip to mrs chia's house on last thurs was cancelled cos jiayi couldn't find the address in yellow pages.

ok gotta go and revise mathXD

Tag replies:
to yuxi: haha you counted or whatXD how are you anyway? feeling better?:)
to LiK: HEY TWIN:) it was my first horror movie too omg SCARY:/
to SITI: haha thanks for tagged-ing! XD I LOVE YOU TOO! should i go flood at your blog? XD
to nina: hey:)
to yiyang: i put my blog url on msn. why do you not come online nowadaysXD

2008-03-17T05:55:00.000-07:00

today we had plenty of free blocks(: and we watched ju-on. ~~of course, most of the time i am looking at yuxi and covering my ears cos i am too scared to look ahead.~~ and of course yuxi seizing the opportunity to make scary, seriously ghostly faces at me and scaring the hell out of me. ~~as we all know, she IS very scary indeed~~ only a few times i glanced at the screen, making sure that its the story instead of the scaring when i do so (guidelines from the class XD). but unfortunately a few times i looked up right as the ghost appeared. one time i screamed out of shock when the blue, pale-skinned little boy appeared under the table XD and almost vomited into yuxi's face (exaggerated, but still, i was feeling rather queasy in the stomach. sure, i really cannot stand horror movies. but luckily i can't remember how the ghosts look like now. sighs. oh, and ruojun and yuxi tried to scare me by kicking me under the table when we were at kfc's WHICH REMINDED ME OF THE GHOST-COMING-OUT-OF-THE-TABLE scene. scary :/

ok nothing today actually. feeling a bit bored.and i just realised i haven't replied PLENTY of tags. hmm. cos i really shut off during the hols XD

love,
cy

Tag replies:
to yunshu: hahahahahahahahaha. basically, how was ting xie?
to jiaqian: miss me? haha XD (:
to brin: hmm, what is that supposed to mean? XD
to jiayi: can't wait for RJ concert! :)))hey really i violin only came back on sat! haha dunno why its always true XD
to joyce: hey(: actually my name has like 9 letters, so compared to other short chinese names its really long XD
to shanj: strings is ALWAYS making me confused. every year they change everything, but it only gets us really really puzzled XD
to siti: HAHA THIS IS TAG-GED? why didn't you blog about mon :(

2008-03-07T05:36:00.000-08:00

i dunno what is wrong with me today/

nothing really, except that lasgne doesn't suit me >< yuxi finished it all though. and I broke the microwave plate today while cooking. ~~like wth~~. the thing was gonna come out anyway. just my dumb luck.

signing off,
cy

I'am breaking down; I just can't take it anymore

~~disgusted with what i saw~~

Tag replies:
to yunshu: YES I DO REPLY YOUR TAGS. like now >< isn't my solution just FABuLOUS?! haha *my ego floods*
to tian: I REALLY LIKE SCHINDLER'S LIST AND I AM SO saaaaadddd...>< that it wasn't chosen:(
to shanjee: really? shall go and download the full score><
to LiK: YOU ARE NOT TYING HAIR RIGHT? RIGHT RIGHT? must look like me kay XD even aft school hols ><
to tzegek: haha it was killer for me XD
to daphne: thanks for tagging(: haha yeah cos i haven't really linked anything yet. or filled up my wishlist. yet.
to shanin: I LIKE SCHINDLER'S LIST MORE :P

so close yet so far

2008-03-06T04:25:00.001-08:00

sigh i really don't like this font

today i forgot to bring my violin AHEM cos i was feeling rather depressed yesterday nightand couldn't be bothered packing my bag XD. anyway it was my first time in my 2-3 years (so GUAI right! but then again, i am the only one who EVER forgot to bring a violin to cca. HAH ridiculous right ><) and today we were trying out the Miss Sa ___ (forgot what word was it) and Schindler's list for strings concert! when i saw it was Schindler's list i was like omg, tianyuan is so lucky to have strings playing two of her favourite pieces this year, namely fantasia and SCHINDLER'S LIST:DD but unfortunately the whole strings liked the other one more and thus we are playing that for our concert and not schindler's list:(( sigh i guess people like faster pieces. but i really see why tianyuan is so MAD:)) about schindler's list. IT WAS SO AWESOMELY BEAUTIFULLLL!<3 it was so sad and so.. well, emotional. one the pieces that can make you cry. I CAN'T BELIEVE I HAVE NEVER HEARD IT BEFORE. but at least now i have the score(: and i am off to download it now HA ><

okie i am off to study social studies. i can't believe i have only read through the readings two times >< *moans* and some people like claudia actually made notes! sigh i am so gonna fail this ><

signing off,
cy

tag replies:
to parisa: thanks(:
to yuxi and jq: haha thanks JQ and once again, i announce that yuxi is a LAMEO. evidence is provided in the tagboard ><
to ALMIGHTY: haha thanks. that *ahem* dosen't even appear on the internet anymore. her blog is totally DEAD! hah.

2008-03-01T05:16:00.001-08:00

the haircut was cancelled. don't ask me why.

haha i am here again, without a blogskin. if the computer was so accessible to me than it would have been so much easier >< today i was VERY WEIRD. like suddenly totally out of character :( i woke up at 6.50am and ended up rushing to school through the backgate - lucky i wasnt late!( i was liek wow, first time i am ever so close. whew.) and then it seriously RAINED in the middle of founders' day. not too heavy at first, but after the concert ended, it started growing heavier. and heavier. wow. and seriously, my appetite was SUPER SUPER huge today. after breakfast (before founders' day), i had half a packet of carrot cake, two slices of the cake i made during cooking yest (yum!), instant noodles, lor mai kai, and seriously, i was still hungry. argh. what is happening to me?!

now i am doing SS reflections that has sth to do with prejudices against Arabs. I cant squeeze out a word now. I finished it till half a page and it seems like an ending, but its too short for Sec 3 standards (duh!). and i think my english vocab is failing miserably.

i shall save you the torture from ~~listening~~ reading all my rantings, and i have finished my social studies reflection! (amidst crap, duh) however i feel proud of myself of being able to crap so much, haha XD ok whatever shall go and download music now.

love,cy

ps. i am really gonna find a blogskin soon. suggestions?

Tag replies:
tianyuan: we can always go in june, right? though i think it would be disappointing for you mon on mon when you see me with worse short hair than before><
yuxi: oh yeah thanks for baking the cake with me(:
likhee: haha not going with tianyuan anymore. and i wanna cut cos its long and flying all over the place:/
claudia: mrs xiah? why? XD

2008-02-25T03:02:00.000-08:00

this is a new blog. just testing this out. who knows, this might die out eventually. but i thought i might have some fun setting up a public blog (at last). i have been deliberately thinking about this for the past few months. (ok.. maybe weeks)

anw this does not have a blogskin yet. haha. a few days before i get everything ready. anw i dont have much time now. and i simply CANNOT wait for my haircut on sat. as stupid as it seems, i havent tried out any new haircut before. haha. lets wait and see if i would simply ah-dore it or hate it for a consistent one month:(

at least now i can start opening this up to ppl. hah.

gotta go.
love, cy